As with my "Some products I'd like to review", "More (unsolicited) reviews, and a request for my readers", and "FINALLY! More (Unsolicited) Product Reviews" posts, these reviews were written over time, and so might be a bit disjointed. I wanted to note my impressions while they were still fresh in my mind, even if it meant the post's continuity is a bit wonky. And these are MY opinions, though I'm sharing them in an effort to help you save money (after all, spending money on something you'll waste is far from frugal!). Anyway, on to the reviews....
Let me say that even though they're expensive, these were a lot larger than I'd expected.
The crust is nice and flaky, whether you bake or microwave it (though baking turns out better. There's a good ratio of "meat" to veggies (though only peas & carrots, no potato?). The "Be'f" is slightly tastier, in my opinion. Gravy's a little salty, but not unbearably so (though these ARE high in sodium). These are very filling!
1/2 "Chik'n" potpie has 440 Calories, 25 g Fat (11 g of which are saturated), 41 g carbs (2 g of which are Fibre), 12 g protein, 34% dv of Sodium (780mg), 20% Iron, 2% Calcium & Potassium.
1/2 "Be'f" potpie has 450 Calories, 25 g Fat (10 g are Saturated), 44 g carbs (1 g Fibre), 11 g protein, 28% dv Sodium (640mg), 20% Iron, and 4% Potassium.
Gardein Be'f and vegetable soup
It's a small can, and doesn't make much. There are a lot of "Be'f" chunks, but not a lot of veggies. The "Be'f" is tender, yet somewhat "meaty". Could do with a little more salt (in spite of the high sodium level) & pepper. The photo on the can is clearly several cans drained and rinsed.
1 can (425g) contains 230 Calories, 6g fat (.5g saturated) 1110mg Sodium (48%!), 27g carbs (4g fibre), 15g protein, 10% Iron & Potassium, 6% Calcium.
Gardein Saus'ge Gumbo
Decent amount of "sausage", but the taste of it is...meh. Few veggies. It's mostly rice and broth. Not terrible tasting, but not as good as a homemade version. Paired well with a Portabello Po' Boy and Emeril's Quick King Cake (I tried it for Mardi Gras).
1 can (425g) contains 210 Calories, 5g fat (1.5g saturated) 1090mg Sodium (47%)!, 30g carbs (3g fibre), 10g protein, 10% Iron & Potassium, 6% Calcium
Gardein Chik'n & Noodl' soup
Again, the small can doesn't make much. I paired it with BLT (using Morningstar Farms "Bacon"). Bluntly, it smells like cat food.
The broth tastes strongly of Nutritional Yeast. Noodles are soft but not quite mushy. Carrots perfectly tender, celery softer than I would've liked. "Chicken" has a very slight "chickeny" taste, but is mostly bland. Texture seems right. Good balance of noodles, "chicken", veggies, and broth.
For some reason, I failed to note the nutritional info. I'm sorry! that should tell you how much I liked it. lol.
Gardein No-Beans Chili
I Ordered 2 cans on Walmart.com, and regretted it.
It looks like diarrhea, smells mostly of cumin. It has a very mushy texture.
As for how it tastes, it's mostly bland, with a hint of cumin. In Veggie "corndogs" with onion & cheese, still pretty "meh". Added a bit of hot sauce to the other can, and tried on veggie dogs with bun & cheese, not bad but not as good as other Vegetarian chilis I've tried.
1 can has 410 Calorie, 21g fat (9g saturated), 29g Carbs (9g of which are fibre), 26g Protein, 1690mg Sodium (73%!), 10% Calcium, 25% Iron, and 20% Potassium
Noodles are rubbery. Very little broth (most of the 1 1/3C water was absorbed). Only a couple tiny bits of red pepper(?) and mushroom, two peas! Very bland, could've done with extra spices at least. I'm not a fan of this
.
1 pkg contains 210 Cal, 1g Fat, 43g Carbs (1g Fibre), 7g protein, 490mg Sodium(21% dv), 6% Iron, 2% each Calcium & Potassium.
Ordered a pack of 12 cups from Walmart. Used boiling water method to make it. There are a few dried veggies added, to give it the illusion of health (lol). Noodles are tender and flavourful. Broth is very rich (and salty). There's a "briny" taste, but it seems to me more like the "Soy Sauce" flavour from Nissin with a bit of seaweed.
1 cup has 280 calories, 12g fat (none saturated), 37g Carbohydrates (1g Fibre), 5g Protein, 1110mg Sodium (49%)!, 10% Iron, 2% Calcium & Potassium.
I found this in the Clearance section of my store, so I couldn't pass it up.
There are three pouches in the box. Oil separates even when room temp, and gets worse when it's heated up. By itself, it tastes eerily like the orange powder in cheap mac & cheese, but with a weird aftertaste. I made nachos using it, Amy's Organic Medium chili, & a lot of hot sauce. The other two pouches sat until I eventually threw them out WAY past "best by" date, oops.
1/4 C contains 150 Calories, 12g Fat (5g of which are Saturated), 9 g Carbs (no Fibre), 1 g protein, 44% dv Sodium (1010 mg)!, and 25% Calcium
Another item I bought on Clearance. Somehow, I didn't get a photo of this one. Sorry.
It smells just like Provolone. Stiffer than dairy Provolone. Initially tastes just like the dairy version, but there's a slight aftertaste. Still, close enough to be recommended. One of the better Vegan cheeses I've had.
1 slice contains 60 Calories, 4.5g Fat (4g Saturated), 4g Carb (no Fibre), NO PROTEIN, 180mg Sodium (8%), no micronutrients.
Beyond Steak
This is my initial impression. Since then, I've bought it many times and used it in everything from stir-fry to tacos to soup.
Kind of grey when frozen, but cooks up decently brown. By itself, it's just okay. Kind of meaty, but not "wow". Chewy, but slightly rubbery.
I added some to sautéed broccoli, mushrooms, and red onions. Then seasoned with Lite Salt, veggie-pepper, and a bit of reduced-sodium soy sauce. That brought out the "beefy" taste. Another time, I fried some up and lightly sprinkled with no-salt-added taco seasoning and black pepper to make crunchy tacos. They worked perfectly! I also made fajitas, with a homemade seasoning blend and lime juice. That plus red onions and bell pepper made for a good fajita. I've even added it to stews, after searing near the end of the stew cooking time. Recommended!
3/4 C (88 grams) contains 170 calories, 6 gm fat (1 gm is saturated), 300 mg Sodium (13% dv), 7 grams carbohydrates (2 gm fibre), 21 grams protein, 2% dv Calcium, 10% dv Iron, and 8% dv Potassium.
Many people feel this is not vegan (since it contains GMO soy which was tested on animals). So if that's a concern for you, you might want to skip this one.
I bought a two pack, though I've since seen 5 packs with less packaging. Two patties pressed into plastic molds and then tightly sealed with thick soft plastic.
Bloody appearance. Weird smell, that intensifies as it browns, then lingers long after you're done cooking. Does get a more "rare" appearance than Beyond Burgers.
Metallic taste, but not "meatlike" to me. They were so focused on "bloody" that they seemed to skimp on taste. Texture is very grainy and unpleasant.
Gave me less gas than Beyond Burgers. But I think I'll stick with Beyond.
1 (1/4lb) patty has 240Cal, 14 gm fat (8 saturated), 0 cholesterol, 9 gm Carbs (3 gm Fibre), 19 gm Protein, 370 mg Sodium, 15% Calcium, 25% Iron, 15% Potassium, 2350% Thiamine, 30% Riboflavin, 35% Niacin, 25% B6, 30% Folate, 15% Phosphorus, and 50% Zinc. So it's basically a multi-vitamin in patty form. lol.
I got a 5 pack of these. Another I no longer have a photo of. Not sure what happened, please forgive me!
They smell like cheap frozen chicken patties (like the kind you get at Dollar Tree, lol).
Microwaving per directions leaves hard spots. Baking it is the way to go, I think. It turned out crispy on the outside and soft inside. Slightly "juicy". Not as chickeny as Quorn patties, but better than many others I've tried over the years.
For some reason, I failed to note the nutritional info.
Gardein turk’y roast
For the first Thanksgiving in years, I couldn't get the Quorn roast I always buy (both stores within walking distance didn't have it anymore and Walmart doesn't show it available either or I would've had it delivered). I like other Gardein products ("burgers", "chicken strips", "meatballs"), so I figured I'd give this one a go for Tgiving 2023. I had to read the directions a few times, because I didn't want to mess it up.
I was impressed with the size, and the gravy packets. It smelled delicious! However....
The crunchy exterior is disconcerting (and one large bit of breading was downright hard). The "turkey" itself has a weird taste (I tried a small bit plain), and the gravy enhances that. The "meat" texture is okay. But the stuffing was just mushy and surprisingly bland.
Cold, the crunch goes away. The stuffing firms up some. But the "meat" loses what flavour it had (it returns when reheated, but not as much).
I think I'll pass on this, and pray either Quorn comes back to my area, or I can find something better. Alas, this is another that I somehow managed to lose the photo of. I suck. :-/
1/5th of a roast (with gravy) contains 260 calories, 10 gm fat (1 gm saturated), 19 gm protein, 24 gm carbohydrates (1 gm of which is fibre), 770 mg Sodium (33% dv)!, 4% Calcium, 15% Iron, and 2% Potassium.
Morningstar Farms Chorizo Crumbles
Spoiler alert: I do NOT like this! I won't even apologize for not taking a photo, it's THAT bad.
It has the texture of the beef crumbles, but red coloured. It tastes like sugar and vinegar, with an aftertaste of "spicy". After I finished gagging, I threw half a package away without even bothering to read the nutritional info. I haven't seen in either of the stores I'd been going to since, but Walmart's site has them. I recommend skipping this one.
Pumfu Chorizo Crumble
This is quite expensive, even on sale. It's soy & gluten free (made from pumpkin seeds).
Smells pretty close to many other "chorizo" products I've had. The colour is more brown than red. It comes in a compressed brick, which is VERY hard to crumble. No matter how much oil you add, it still sticks (and sucks up all the oil quickly, so it would be quite high in fat).
Mushy texture, bland by itself but with a slight after-burn. I added a bit of hot sauce and some vinegar (which made it somehow gummy), then added in a couple eggs to make "chorizo and egg" wraps. Texture is still off, but the eggs and tortillas made it a little better. Not something I'd buy again, but not the worst "chorizo" I've had.
1/3 bag has 270 Cal, 18g Fat (3.5g Sat) by itself, 20g Carbs (4g Fibre), 11g Protein, 250mg Sodium, 4% dv Calcium, 20% Iron, 2% each Potassium & Vitamin C.
I bought this BOGO (with no minimum purchase, so half off). I'm glad I did wait for a sale, because it gave me a headache.
Smells spicy when you open the package. Looks like Fiber One cereal. Cooks into a red flaky appearance.
By itself, it is slightly bland, yet tastes like chili powder (nothing more). It's rubbery. When added to a soft taco (beans, cheese, lettuce, tomato, light sour cream) it is less obviously rubbery, but still tastes like you're eating chili powder. There's a subtle aftertaste as well. Adding hot sauce didn't help.
Won't buy again.
1/4 pkg contains 90 Calories, 1.5 g fat (directions require added oil), 4g Carb (2g Fibre), 15g Protein, 20% dv Sodium, 6% Calcium, 15% Iron, & 2% Potassium.
Bigger than other Veggie "Pepperoni" I've had before. Tried one raw (I know, I know) and it was very plain. Put on a pizza with onion, bell pepper, canned no-salt-added mushrooms, black olive slices, MSF Italian "Sausage" (which appears to be discontinued), & a bit more cheese. Was squishy and still not very tasty. Better if briefly fried in a little oil.
18 slices has 140 calories, 11 gm fat (1 gm saturated), 540 mg Sodium (23% dv), 5 gm carbs (less than 1 gm is fibre), 7 gm protein, 2% dv each Calcium & Iron, and 4% Potassium.
I bought this on sale from Walmart's site. At the time, it was not cheap even then (it's since come down significantly).
It smells weird. You cook it from frozen and it sticks, even with plenty of oil. Plus it really makes the oil splatter. I haven't had it in years, so I'm not sure if it tastes like real SPAM, but it's good.
40g serving, 70 calories, 5g protein, 4g fat (none saturated), 3g carbs (1g fibre), 180mg Sodium, 143mg Potassium, 20mg Calcium, and 1mg Iron. Not sure why I noted it that way instead of "Percent Daily Value".
Another thing I ordered from Walmart's site. This had to be shipped, rather than delivered from the store.
Like real SPAM, it comes in a can. There's none of that weird SPAM goop. Brown colour. Slightly soft, pasty texture holding together firmer bits that are darker brown. It smells exactly like what I remember SPAM smelling like. When I tasted a bit raw, it was more fishy than I expected. Fried in oil (splatters and sticks), slices are firmer and have a more mild taste. Still sort of fishy, hard to explain. Also saltier tasting when cooked. But not bad. I think I prefer the frozen stuff, though.
55 grams (about 1/6th can) has 130 calories, 10 grams fat (4.5 grams are saturated), 5 grams protein, 4 grams carbs (all 4 are fibre!), 270 mg Sodium (12% dv), 6% Iron, 3% Potassium, and 14 mg Calcium (not enough for them to calculate a %dv).
It's been eons since I've had real fish sticks. But these are a lot more flat than I remember, and with coarser breading.
I've tried them fried and baked. Fried comes out slightly better. But there's just not much "fish" taste. Texture seems a bit crumbly rather than flaky. Tartar sauce MIGHT help, if you like it (I never have). But for "fish", I think Gardein is better (too bad they don't make "Fish" sticks, only patties). I also used to like Sophie's Kitchen, but haven't seen their products in a while (and their website is gone).
5 sticks contain 220 calories, 11g fat (1g saturated), 12g protein, 17g carb (1g fibre), 460mg Sodium (20%), 2% each Calcium & Potassium, and 10% Iron.
Sorry the box is dented in the photo.
Two in a package. Not sure why you need to add oil, they seem to ooze some. KEEP COVERED, they splatter a LOT. Has a somewhat "fishy" smell. I put on a bun with cheese, lettuce, tomato, and mayo. Subtle "fish" taste that works perfectly with those toppings.
Since writing this, I've bought it a couple more times. They're definitely not bad. Though a bit pricy.
1 patty has 200 calories, 11 grams fat (7 grams saturated), 16 grams protein, 10 grams carbs (2 grams fibre), 540 mg Sodium (23% dv), 4% each Calcium & Potassium, and 15% Iron.
A little smaller than a Hot Pocket. Bread dough rather than pastry. Baked up slightly crispy. When cut on diagonal, you can see a decent amount of filling. Subtle smoky flavour, and a sweetness. Reminiscent of cheese.
1 pocket = 290 calories, 10g fat (3.5g saturated), 560mg Sodium (24%), 37g carb (3g fibre), 11g Protein, 10% Calcium & Iron, 6% Potassium.
No link on their site anymore, so I'm guessing these were discontinued. But if you do see them, they're worth a try.
Box shows a lot of filling, but they actually have almost none.
Don't try the microwave method. They stick to the paper towels and you end up having to pick off shreds. Plus the tortillas are mushy and grainy.
Baked, the tortillas are delightfully crispy.
Regardless of preparation, the corn flavour dominates. In fact, in most bites I can't even taste filling.
I served with dollops (on the side) of hot salsa, light sour cream, and queso dip. Tasted with each: Sour cream was okay, salsa dominated, queso added the best taste. But even trying all three couldn't save these. It's a pass for me, especially as:
ONE taquito has 120 calories, 3.5g fat (0 sat), 90mg Sodium, 18g carb (3g fibre), 4g Protein, 4% Iron, & 2% Calcium.
I baked them per the directions. The outer wrapper gets very crispy. But the inner wrapper is thin and falls apart easily. Lots of corn and beans, but not much of the "Chorizo" or "Cheddar". Okay, but not worth the price I paid (on sale). Maybe some of the others would be better, I don't know.
1 Bing has 230 calories, 11 grams fat (3 grams saturated), 7 grams protein, 25 grams carbohydrates (2 grams of which are fibre), 320mg (14% dv) Sodium, 4% Calcium, 6% Iron, and 8% Potassium.
Very thick and "meaty" looking. Tomato-ey taste right out the jar, but very sweet. Used for lasagne and it turned out even MORE sweet somehow! I haven't bought it since.
1/2C: 80 calories, 1.5g fat (0g sat), 4g protein, 13g carbs (3g fibre), 480mg Sodium (21%), 1.1mg (6%) Iron, 40mg (4%) Calcium, 370mg (8%) Potassium.
More in the bag than Beyond Jerky (which I had planned to review, but lost the notes! Sorry). Larger pieces than I was expecting. Soft and not chewy. Doesn't taste much of smoke OR pepper. It seems more salty and slightly bitter to me. Not worth the cost.
1 oz serving, 80 Calories, 3.5g fat (0g saturated), 7 g protein, 5g carb (2g Fibre), 600mg Sodium (26%), 4% Iron
These look like pork rinds, sort of. I guess. Probably more like Cheeto blobs. No weird bubbles like pork rinds normally have.
Texture seems slightly off from what I remember. And no greasy taste. Not that hot. Vegan.
1oz contains 130 calories, 6g fat (.5g saturated), 200mg Sodium, 13g carbs (1g fibre), 7g protein, 8mg (0%) Calcium, 1mg (6%) Iron, 49mg (2%) Potassium, 0mcg Vitamin D.
These look closer to pork rinds than the other flavour. Still no weird bubbles. Taste is close to what I remember pork rinds being. I'd buy these again, if my stores hadn't quit carrying them.
1oz serving, 130 calories, 6g fat (.5g saturated), 190mg Sodium, 13g carbs (1g fibre), 7g protein, 6mg Calcium (0%), 1mg Iron (6%), 49mg (2%) Potassium, 0mcg Vitamin D.
I bought these on Clearance for 70¢. It appears they may have been discontinued. Probably for the best. If you CAN find them anywhere, I'd suggest leaving them on the shelf.
The mascot or whatever he is looks perverted. lol.
The puffs look like cheese puffs, but smaller and hard (and less weird-orange).
Taste initially is strange and kind of gross, yet somehow bland. Aftertaste of "heat". The more you eat, the more you taste the heat, but with that strange under-taste.
GAVE ME DIARRHEA
Since they call in meal-in-a-bag, info per bag (3 servings): 400 calories, 19g fat (2g saturated), 590mg Sodium (26%), 35g carbs (3g fibre), 21g Protein, 8% Potassium. 30% each Vitamin D, Riboflavin, Niacin, B6, B12, Iodine, Selenium, Chromium, Molybdenum, Calcium. 35% each Vitamins A, C, K, Thiamin, Zinc, Copper, Manganese. 45% Iron. 80% Vitamin E.
Until next time....